Wednesday, May 11, 2016


So after you have a baby, your milk comes in.
You feed your child and you feel so much gratitude to your body for making this amazing substance. 
I sit here now and feed Lucy's new brother.
It brought me back to right after my sweet girl died, sitting there in the car by her graveside, pumping. Just pumping. What else could I do? My breast were full and about to burst. I had to pump to relieve them. Bottles full. Breasts empty. No sweet baby to give my precious milk. No cooler on hand so store it... So I said to my sweet 5 year old boy. "I guess I should just dump it out" and he said "No" and grabbed it from me... He ran to Lucy's grave and poured it out and said "Now Lucy can drink it" 

My eyes cry, my heart aches, my body longs for her to drink it too my sweet boy.